Friday, August 20, 2010I am tired of being the fattest person in the class
I am tired of not feeling good enough when I am putting my all in at the gym
I am tired of struggling to keep up in workout classes
I am tired of hiding in the back of the room
I am tired of hating how I look in the mirror
I am tired of being unhappy
I am tired of being concerned with what other people see when they look at me
I am tired of not being my own friend
I am tired of thinking I will never be as hot as I want too
I am tired of worrying that everything I eat is going to make me gain more weight
I AM TIRED!
...I am going to do my best to stop focusing on all of the negative in my life and use this to push forward. Yes I am the fat girl in the back of the room struggling to keep up in kickboxing and cardio classes but at least I am in the classes!
...I need to tell myself that its only my second week back at the gym, that stamina & weight loss takes time. I didn't gain all this weight in 2 weeks and I won't loose it 2 weeks.
... I need to remind myself I am beautiful and worth it, that I will not give up on myself no matter how frustrating this journey may be.
...I will to tell myself that I have wonderful people in my life both on and off the internet that are going to support me in the good times and bad.
And most importantly I need to remind myself that::
I CAN DO THIS!
...I am not tired anymore.